Okay, I am a happy camper.
President Obama was re-elected tonight, in case you hadn’t heard, and yes, I’m happy about that. It’s not that I think O is the greatest president we ever had, nor do I think he has all the answers. I did have some issues with some of the things he did over the past four years, or, more accurately, the way he did them. He managed to get health care reform passed, but it wasn’t quite the “change” I’d have liked to have seen, for example. It was still a pretty big blowjob for the insurance companies and still leaves the United States as the only industrialized Western nation without free universal health care for all its citizens. He did end the war in Iraq… well, kind of on paper, anyway. No, he’s far from perfect.
But, oh, the alternative…. what a douchebag.
Obama’s campaign slogan, “Forward,” was perfectly chosen and seems, to me, to be representative of the entire election, not just the Presidential one. Think about it. This election saw marijuana legalized… ACTUALLY legalized in three states, those three douchebags who talked about “legitimate rape” tossed out of office, and same-sex marriage became legal in three more states. It seems we are moving forward indeed. Keep in mind that I am neither gay nor much of a pot smoker… but these things just make sense, don’t they? I think so, anyway.
I’m also happy to see Elizabeth Warren win, just because I like her. She makes a good guest on Real Time With Bill Maher every once in a while.
Anyway, I’d like to speak now directly to President Obama.
Barry, dude… I had your back. I voted for you both times. The first time because I believed in the things you had to say, but I’ll admit that it was also because I grew up in Arizona and I’d had an assfull of John McCain already as he’d been a senator since I was a senior in high school. and that running mate of his… holy shit. You were the obvious choice. This time around I heard a lot of people complaining about you and the things you’d done or not done with those first four years. A lot of them were just racist assholes looking for excuses to complain about our African American president, but some had good points. This time around I voted for you because I saw just how much the Republicans tried to fight you and stonewall you on everything you tried to do. some of the plans you introduced were carbon copies of things introduced in the past by Republican legislators. They were all for them at one time, but once they came out of your mouth they treated them like poison. I get it. They’re dickheads. I also felt that the last asshole who was stinking up your pad on Pennsylvania Avenue had eight years to make the mess we’re in, you deserve eight to try to clean up after him. That said, I have to ask you, Barry… please… don’t fuck this up.